Life is too short to spend it cleaning dishes and mopping floors! Save yourself from the weekly “horrors” of chores and hire the Movie Monster Maid Service. Our trained staff of vampires, werewolves, mummies, swamp monsters and zombies is here to terrorize all that dirt and grime out of your lives once and for all!
The Movie Monster Maid Service was created over a decade ago by a group of monsters that was fed up with living on the outskirts of society. Sick of living in musty caves, abandoned castles and cobwebbed tombs, these entrepreneurial enemies of the world decided to clean up their image and go into business helping humans instead of murdering them.
Our team of maids is so good it’s scary! Upon entering your home, your monsters will immediately go to work with their feather dusters, mops and sponges to exterminate your soap scum and bite the heads off your dust bunnies. Each team member has a specialized job to ensure maximum efficiency and effectiveness:
Dracula: “Bleh! I want to suck your floors (with my vacuum)”
Mummy: “I’m a walking feather duster!”
Werewolf: “Me make windows sparkle like full moon”
Swamp Monster: “Tub scrub and pool cleaning.”
Zombie: “Draaaains! I clean your draaaaains!”
So what are you waiting for? Drive a wooden stake right through heart of your dirty drapes! Shoot a silver bullet into that cruddy commode! Rip out the brain and spinal cord of your moldy bathroom tile!
Pick up the phone and call the Movie Monster Maid Service today! We’ll get your home so spotless, that you’ll be howling at the moon with happiness!
Don’t forget, many of our monsters have supernatural powers – so we can clean where other maid services won’t dare to go! Werewolf’s super strength lifts furniture to attack those hidden dust balls. Mummy puts a curse on mildew to kill it dead once and for all. Dracula transforms into a bat to reach smudges on high ceilings!
Stop being afraid of your dirty house and start taking action! Let our team of monsters “kidnap” your dirt and carry it kicking and screaming back to our “lair” (offices in the strip mall at Dover and Franklin) for total annihilation. Pick up the phone and call now!
If you like this, then other humor blog posts you may like include:
- Almanac Brown: Elderly Detective
- How To Look Older
- Where Are All The Hideous Swamp Monsters When You Need Them?