Husbands, does that monthly visit from Aunt Flo have your wife serving dinner with a side of sass? Boyfriends, are the irrational emotions of your lady friend getting in the way of going “all the way?” Sons, are mommy’s screaming fits and unfair punishments keeping you from watching your favorite television program?
Whether you’re young or old, black or white, all men have been negatively affected by the unnatural horrors of female menstruation. Now, FlimCo introduces the revolutionary new product that will have you waving goodbye forever to the insidious one-week beast that has plagued mankind since the dawn of time.
Introducing: That-Time-of-the-Month Tubes! That’s right, That-Time-of-the-Month Tubes!
That-Time-of-the-Month Tubes are small, single-female storage containers that are designed to safely and efficiently detain the bad-tempered housewife for up to seven days!
How does it work? At the first sign of sass, take your lady of choice and place her within your That-Time-of-the-Month Tube. Then, simply close the door to instantly lock away all those unnatural womanly emotions!
Once inside, your housewife will continue to fume with anger, spewing poisonous fire breath and attempting to guilt you into doing HER housework – but don’t worry, because you won’t hear any of it! Thanks to FlimCo’s advanced soundproofing technology, That-Time-of-the-Month Tubes effectively isolate all levels of bitchiness!
Set her and forget her! No longer will you have to wait an entire five to seven days before peace and tranquility are restored to your household! Simply seal your wife, girlfriend or mother in this miracle tube, and walk away for INSTANT RELIEF!
As your loved one shouts and curses within the chamber, her hot-headed antics will inevitably cause the extra-thick glass window to fog with steam. This process serves as a natural deterrent to those piercing glances or “mom looks” that may otherwise poison the surrounding area. And once the fog fades, you know the whole tirade has finally blown over and you can safely remove your gal pal without fear or repercussions!
That-Time-of-the-Month Tubes preserve your little lady for MAXIMUM FRESHNESS!
Wonder what goes on inside that tube until the fog fades? You’ll sleep easy knowing that the internal chamber was designed with a woman’s touch in mind. Unique features such as lavender air freshener, makeup kit and woman’s fashion magazines are designed to simultaneously pamper and subdue your lovely lady!
Finally, no more interruptions during the big game! No more complaints about how you need to be more romantic! And most importantly, no more conversations that start with the phrase, “We need to talk!”
Say, “so long” to the dreaded monthlies forever with the help of That-Time-of-the-Month Tubes!
That-Time-of-the-Month Tube is the newest family innovation from FlimCo – the makers of Grandpa Hat and The Baby Box! FlimCo – fixing your family tree since 1983!
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